


Omission

by Not From Stars (Shadowcat)



Category: Forbidden Game - L. J. Smith
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-24
Updated: 2011-12-24
Packaged: 2017-10-28 00:50:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/301926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowcat/pseuds/Not%20From%20Stars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jenny's grieving and Dee reminds her that she has friends that will always stand beside her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Omission

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Katarik](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katarik/gifts).



It hurt.

She hadn't expected it to hurt this much or for this long.

It had been several months since the last Game -- since the group of them had tumbled back into the hall of her Grandfather's house in Pennsylvania. Months since she had held Julian's hand as he died.

He had died for her. He had died because he had been protecting her.

And oh god, it hurt that he wasn't out there somewhere. Hurt so much that sometimes at night she sat at the end of her bed, facing the wall with her knees drawn up to her chin as she _willed_ him to come out of the wall. Then she would spend the rest of the night crying until she fell asleep.

Things hadn't been the same in their group since they had returned to California. While she and Zach had gotten so much closer, she and Tommy -- Tom -- had managed to drift further and further apart. Finally they came to a conclusion that would have been an unimaginable horror to her a year ago.

They broke up.

This time, however, it wasn't like what happened after the first Game. She wasn't hurt or confused about Tom not wanting to be around her or avoiding her unless he was trying to play secret bodyguard where she couldn't see him. No, this time Jenny knew what was happening and helped move the decision along.

She was no longer in love with Tom the way she had been since second grade when she kissed him beneath the tree. She loved him, but now it had eased back into the kind of love that she would have for a dear friend -- and they would always be friends. They had been through too much together in their lives not to be. Tom's feelings for her weren't the same, either. He had an innate need to be with someone who needed him to be the protector and take care of her. Jenny was no longer that person. She could not only take care of herself, she had taken care of all of them during all three of the Games.

Things are always changing.

Their friends understood, of course. Everything that they had gone through changed each of them that were involved in different ways. Audrey and Dee had been expecting a change like this to happen since before the Games, if they were all perfectly honest.  
Honesty that they shared with her, but not even Dee would be tactless enough to say that to Tom.

Just because all of that had been figured out, it didn't mean that all was perfect and calm within Jenny's mind. She had too many thoughts and sometimes she would find herself being quiet in her group while things were discussed around her.

Dee decided that this new sadness of Jenny’s had gone on long enough and one night, she dropped in to find her friend sitting beside her pool. She shook her head and went to sit next to Jenny. She didn’t say anything at first, just put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. When she felt the wetness that alerted her to the fact that her dearest friend was silently crying, Dee leaned her head against hers.

“Oh, sweetie,” Dee said softly, dropping a kiss on Jenny’s head. “It will be all right. I promise you, everything will work itself out.”

“It’s been so hard, Dee,” Jenny finally said after a few moments. “It’s been so very hard.”

“He really got under your skin.” There was no condemnation or judgment in her tone of voice. “He woke up a part of you that you never realized you had.”

“I know it makes me a horrible person to miss him after everything he did to us.”

“No,” Dee shook her head. “Oh, Jenny, no. It doesn’t make you a horrible person at all. It makes you _Jenny_ and it proves everything we said to the rest of the Shadow Men about you being too good to be taken like they wanted to do.”

“He hurt all of you so much.” Her voice was only slightly above a whisper. “He hurt you all and that’s not even counting the anguish he caused Summer’s family.”

“Then he saved your life – twice from what you’ve told me.” She rested her chin on Jenny’s head. “I have to give him some slack on the other events. Aba would say that he tried to atone for his previous actions.”

“Aba is a very wise woman,” Jenny said softly. “After all, she listened to us and believed what we told her from the very beginning,”

“Yeah, that was pretty amazing. It was nice to have one so-called adult who was willing to hear what we had to say and never assumed it was anything but the truth.” Dee sighed. “You need to quit beating yourself up, Jenny. You were not responsible for anything that happened to any of us.”

“If it hadn’t been for me, you guys never would have come to his attention and all of the things that happened to you wouldn’t have occurred. No one would have gotten hurt.” Jenny took a hitching breath. “If it hadn’t been for my poor planning with Tom’s party and stupid determination to have something different and spectacular for it then he wouldn’t have targeted you.”

“Maybe or maybe not, but if it hadn’t happened the way it did, then you would have been all alone when he came for you. If you were alone you could have gotten hurt or worse.” She tightened her arm reflexively. “I couldn’t have dealt with that, Jenny. I wouldn’t have been able to handle losing you like we lost Summer.”

“Summer wasn’t dead.”

“Because Julian saved her life rather than let what we saw stay reality.” It should have been strange for her to be defending the Shadow Man, but for some reason his death had caused a wound in her best friend that she didn’t know how to heal. “Talk to me, Jenny. You haven’t talked much to any of us about that day and you can’t keep it all locked inside.”

“He’s dead, Dee. He’s dead and it’s my fault.”

“No.” Dee’s voice was as strong and even as she could make it.”You didn’t kill him.”

“But he died protecting me.”

“That was _his_ choice, Jenny. You didn’t force him into anything. He weighed the options and decided that your life was more important.”

It was a sentiment that Dee agreed with completely. If she had been forced to choose between Jenny’s life or Julian’s life, she would have chosen Jenny without having to think about it. Jenny had been her best friend since they were little girls.

“I don’t know what to do, Dee.” Jenny’s voice shook.

“You don’t do anything,” Dee whispered. “You take your life one day at a time and live it for all that you’re worth. Grieve for him, and remember that you’re not alone. You’re never alone. We may not always understand why you’re hurting over him, but we’re you’re friends and we’ll help you through it.”

The girls drifted into a familiar and comfortable silence as they listened to the sounds of the night around them. Dee kept her arm around Jenny the whole time.

She meant what she said, and she meant more than she had the words to explain. Jenny was her best friend and no matter what, she was always going to be there to protect her and to give her someone to lean on.

 _Always_.


End file.
